_{Some ‘Why am I Like This Moments’ I have had in recent times.}

_{On Mental Exhaustion}

_{I engage my mind more than any other aspect of my body.  At times with my permission and at other times without. I have a very hyperactive mind and taming it is a herculean task. Occasionally, I  go the flight mode route on purpose but this mind has a mind of its own. I am tempted to think it is a person, a human on steroids and because of the level of work it does, exhaustion is always a consequence. The people close to me know I punctuate a lot of conversations with I am tired.}

_{Aside: I heard people that constantly  sit in front of a laptop or TV suffer from the ‘ Tired Syndrome’.  How true is this?}

_{On Conversational Laziness}

_{I hit 23 and talking became a chore. Before now, not talking was a choice, it was not something that came natural to me. When I put my mind to it, like really really put my mind to it, I can be quiet. The kind of quiet that makes you get the creeps. I could be with you in a room and the whole time not say anything if I chose to.}

_{Really weird stuff.}

_{My quietness is not exactly surprising. It can be explained away because I am both introverted and extroverted. Ambiverted is the term for it actually but I am not exactly chummy with labels and all.}

_{This season came and with it came a need for intentional quietness. I get the reason why but at times I think I hide being lazy under the cloak of ‘shift in season’.}

_{It is justifiable but the truth still remains, I  am conversationally lazy.}

_{Or maybe I am not, I Just think I am.}

_Whatever..

_{So, conversational laziness came on board and now I almost resent people that rouse me to talk be it virtual or face-to-face, especially when it is about people.  I truly cannot  remember the last time I initiated a conversation out of curiosity or just for social etiquette reason/ to be perceived as socially compliant. Talking  just seems like so much work and frankly, I am not interested in being socially correct.}

_{What does that even mean?}

_{On the outside it seems like I am just a quiet person but within, I know it is because I am just  mentally exhausted lazy. Conversationally lazy.}

_{Aside: I initiated a conversation about sex with a guy I am familiar with today. Conversation went like:}

_{“Are you sexually active?”}

_{“What do you think about sex?”}

_{Dude answered my questions with so much tact, I told him something that meant}

_{“You are my new buddy”.}

_{Dude went like “You are special”.}

_Lol

_{I know right.}

_{On Introversion and Extroversion}

_{My type of introversion  can be likened to sipping tea, steaming, hot tea. I like to take people in in little sips. I observe you and then come out gradually, when I know you can take me in. When you come at me  too strong or too slow, I shut down. When a conversation is more about people than ideas I get bored. I think it’s a kind of snobbery.}  

_{On the flip side though, this kind of snobbery is justifiable.}

_Yes?

_{I take my life really really  really seriously,  to sit and talk about people to me is to be intentional about being stupid.  I am quick to go mum when a conversation that was about ideas turns into a discussion about people and their flaws. I let the awkwardness of my sudden silence do the talking. As a precaution though, I listen in on conversations and I watch out for what the person is saying before I talk. Once I get a green light, my extroversion intercepts. I come all out and then talk and talk and talk  like conversations is going out of fashion.}